8 Weeks Post Op

Time passing by okay. Still have my fat clothes. Issues over here. Next step is to put those 5xl clothes on as suggested and to stand in front of a mirror and look at what I look like in them. Holly's husband's comment, to her when she was having giving clothes away issues: "Are you keeping them for when you can wear them again" or something like that, makes me think real hard too. Will try again this week to part with them.

Date of surgery: 349.7 pounds
Weigh In 1/28/06: 300 pounds
Minus : 49.7 pounds

More people are noticing that I am losing weight. The comments are increasing especially about my thinning
face. I love it. I haven't bought any new clothes, I just go through my clothes and find something I haven't worn for years. No joke years, and some of that stuff is fashionable now thanks to the babyboomers. All I have to add is my big dangling earrrings and I am in fashion. I do ask my husband if I look like a fat person stuffed in tight clothes before leaving the house, I definitely do not want that look. I have absolutely no butt so my jeans are very very baggy in that area. I did buy a new bra, using Oprah's suggestions and the girls are now where they supposed to be.

Eating is okay. I have found several ways of eating chicken that are tolerable and I look forward to eating it. I cut back on eating so much fish as I worry about absorbing too much mercury, now just two times a week. I can eat lean pork if it's moist and not hard. Cooked vegies are fine. Fruit without the skin I can tolerate, I haven't tried an orange yet, been afraid to since my friend who had WLS dumped on it, something about the white stringy thing. When I'm hungry between meals, I have a boiled egg or fruit.

Yesterday went to a Chinese Restaurant with my cousin and her adult kids. Eat all you like buffet that I used love. Used to make 3 to 4 trips through the buffet line and then go home and nap. Well, I was overwhelmed by their plates. Kept telling myself, I couldn't believe that I used to eat like them. Looked around the restaurant and saw fat people eating and eating and eating. My goodness that used to be me. I ordered from the menu, shrimp eggplant in black bean sauce, had them hold the rice. Took four pieces of pineapple from my cousin's plate and that was my lunch. I got left over shrimp eggplant in my frigerator, enough for two more meals. The owner kept looking at me, smiling. Must have been thinking, " I save money, she not eating me out of house and hold today."

You know when Hawaiians go to a buffet to eat, they eat. My neices and nephews wiped out the buffet and then waited for the buffet to be refilled several times. My niece when done had five empty plates stacked in front of her and a mountain of shrimp shells on a sixth plate. Their plan after eating was to go home sleep.

All in all it was an eye opening experience and an opportune time to reflect on my past eating habits. I was sort of sitting there in amazement as I watched the food on my relatives plates being literally devoured. They kept asking me, "that's all you going eat?" but did not push me to eat anything more. I am so happy that I don't eat like that anymore. Was hard to hold a steady conversation while people are stuffing their faces so I did most of the talking and they just nodded and remarked here and there. I tried my best not to picture pigs eating at a trough cause that's how I used to eat, like there is no tomorrow, like it is my last meal on earth,
likeI got to store for the days of famine.

I am no longer a buffet junky. Yeeeeeeeeeeeeehaw! I know all the best places to eat. I know who serves generously and for good price. Besides McDonalds we have drivein's that serve generous plate lunches with two scoops rice and salad as part of the meal. No wonder so many overweight people in Hawaii. Hawaii McDonald's serve breakfast plate lunches : two scrambled eggs, big scoop rice with spam or bacon or sausage for about $4. You know those Hawaiian posters you see with those skinny hula girls, well I do not know where they found those skinny hula girls, they either pre-puberty or anorexic cause the ones not in the posters all got nice curvy hips and supple bodies.

Now when I go out to eat, my husband orders quickly and me I sit pouring over the menu, looking, looking and looking and thinking and thinking, and can not decide what is the healthiest for me to eat. Usually I end up with a chicken or shrimp dish that I end up taking home after a few bites. I love it. No way am I going to be fat again. What amazes me is that I am not bothered by all the food around me and I literally have no cravings for them. Well, the surgery was not a piece of cake and I sure as hell did not go through all that for nothing. And of course I like being so much healthier and thinner.

CLOTHES ISSUES

Main topic with my psychologist yesterday was my having a hard time giving away my big clothes. Prior to surgery I packed my old clothes in crates ranging from 5XL to clothes from high school. Told myself that as I lose weight I will give my clothes away. Yeah, right.

Well, I defintely don't fit the 5XL clothes anymore. So I pulled them out, looked at them, thought about who I giving them to and then repacked them and put them away. Yup, I still have them.

I have issues about giving them away.

My psychologist said I am having a hard time letting go of my old obese self. It's like death she said. I have to go through the process of letting go that part of my life, accept it is gone and move on. Okay, so how do I get rid of these big clothes? Give them away she said and I will go through all the feelings of letting go and I will be fine.

Okay, today I will try try try to give away my clothes without having too much trauma.

7 WEEKS POST OP

Unbelievable, today is 7 weeks post op. I feel so good. I feel so healthy. Weighed myself at the air cargo again, heh this scale is checked all the time certified so I get the real scoops on how much I weigh.

Day of surgery 12/02/05 : 349.7 pounds
Today 01/20/06 : 303 pounds
Total Loss : 47.7 pounds

Doing really good with vitamins/minerals and getting in at least 50 grams of protein with two shakes a day.
More protein from egg, chicken or fish daily. Still forget sometimes to sip, but since almost drowning myself by gulping down ice water I am sipping better.

Per my dietician I can start Soft Diet with Starch today:

1 oz. tender well cooked meats, tofu or cooked fish plus
1 oz. fruit canned in lite syrup or soft fleshed fruit w/out skin or l oz. soft vegetable cooked or canned plus
1 oz. starch examples: cooked potato, oatmeal, cream of wheat, cooked noodles, rice, 2 crackers,1/4 to 1/2
slice toast
Things are looking up.....................food wise. Though I kind of okay with what I eating already. I have a hard time swallowing beef as I picture it fermenting in my tummy, I have tried but I end up chewing it and then spitting it out. I have resorted to watering down my crystal lite tea and diet cranberry and low cal V8 splashes, cause now things just taste too sweet. I kind of scared to add starches into my diet, cause what if taste too good and can not stop. Maybe if I leave it to the last ounce, when I am already full from the other 2 oz. of stuff I can eat.

Handicap Toilet
I haven't gone anywhere yet where I needed to use a public toilet so this will definetly be an experience for me. I hated the regular sized toilet stalls which sometimes I was forced to use cause I couldn't hold it another second. I always had to practically climb on the toilet, manuever my stomach, just to close the toilet door. Then sometimes the toilet roll would be right against my hip so it was a task to get to it. Then of course I had to stand up to take care of business when done. Then it was backing up practically climbing on the toilet to get out of the stall. After hearing from some of you that I probably can use a regular stall now, that will be my mission on my next visit to the mall, check out the toilets. Geeeeeeeeeeeee. Maybe I should bring a witness to this event!

Life is defintely not boring after WLS. Smile. Heh, I find pleasure in being able to do such simple tasks now days.

FESSING UP

Heh I got to fess up. I also broke a toilet seat couple months ago. I also had my butt pinched. My husband asked me what happend to the new toilet seat he had just installed. I told him " I don't know, cheap."

What a blessing to know that I am not the only who has broken a toilet seat. Thanks for all the sharing. Now we can laugh about it, but before it was one of those "I could just die" moments. Yes, it is nice to not have to worry about where I park my butt now.

Normal

So happy that I got quite a few comments on my last blog. Hearing comments of how even six years after surgery one's taste buds still evolve, is good to hear. Thought I was losing it, with these taste buds going wacky. I have now learned to buy one or two of something and wait to see if I can tolerate it a third time. I'm one of those that buy in bulk, well that doesn't work anymore or I'll end up with the cabinets or refrigerator full of stuff I can't stand to look at, let alone eat. I have been trying to explain to my husband that this is normal and have shared with him the comments posted on my blog.

You have all helped me from being certified "paranoid", "crazy" or "losing it" by my husband.

As for the loose skin, I not complaining about it, yet, just noting that they are defintely there. I may need to buy shares of Gold Bond powder. I rather have this skin, then the fat that made me so deathly ill. I had no boobs prior to getting fat, so I have returned to my prefat boob stage. I graduated from high school wearing training bras. So I should not be having issues about this. Right? Wrong. Now that I have had the opportunity to know what it is to have boobs, I think I going put some back later on down the line.

Heh, a miracle happened last week. I can actually sit on the toilet and wipe myself. You know not have to stand up and do like one Chinese acrobat to take care of business. There was times I almost pulled my arm out of socket. No act like you haven't been there, alright. Smile. Heh, I can get used to this "new/old" skill.

And Kim, I can wash under my feet now, not the step step on the washcloth deal. I can even shave my legs without having to take one breathing break. Quality of life, improving here!

Taste Buds

I am finding that some foods I used to like right after WLS I no longer like. My taste buds or something must be changing. I am finding that I need to water down the Light Cranberry Juice I mix the Isopure in as it is too sweet tasting now and even the Crystal Lite tea. I used to mash up light mayo with my boiled egg and yesterday I couldn't stand it and had the egg just with pepper on it. The suger free popsicles are starting to leave an aftertaste and I don't get excited about eating them any more. What's happening?

I also today with great thirst chugalugged gulps of ice water to my horror without thinking. Weird feelings, hiccups and tons of burps later, I finally calmed down. How in the world did I forget to sip! You can't do nothing but wait to see what going happen. Thank goodness no vomiting but one hell of a scare.

Tommorrow I hope to start going back to the pool. Tried on my bathing suit that I used to stuff myself in and when it ripped I sewed and patched up several times, real pitiful looking. Black, so I probably resembled Shamu the whale in it. Well, it got tossed in the rubbish can, as I also tried on a new suit I had bought that was a little too snug before and now fits. Woooooooooopeeeeee!

Yesterday my brother called me, he's retired and babysits his grandkids. Anyway he tells me that he has been watching Dr. Phil, Oprah and some other show on people who lost lots of weight. He then talks about all the loose skin people get when they lose a lot of weight. He then asks me how my skin doing. Only a brother, right? Concern? Or is he poking fun? Should I kick his ass? Told him not to worry about my loose skin, I will take appropriate action as needed. Smile. After that I kept thinking of that poor lady on Oprah who lost so much weight her boobs went down to her waist and she literally rolled it up and put it in her bra. I won't have that problem. I have just no boobs just two small shrunken pouches, no more than a handful each, sigh. Oh well, I could have been rolling it up from my knees and appear on Oprah for the world to see. I could be making royalties from writing a book about it. Oh well, my chances of winning the lottery aren't so good either. With the fat, went my boobs.

Six Weeks Post Op

Can't believe I am six weeks post op. I don't know how to explain this unreal feeling I have about my weight loss. Is it for real? How long will it be till I gain it all back? Should I give my big clothes away yet or should I wait in case something goes wrong? Am I really going to lose more weight? Just don't know how to explain this sureal feelings I still have. Like I'm going to wake up from this dream and I'll be my fat self again.

My friend Darcy is four years post op. She's an example of what a person who had WLS shouldn't do. Because of her I was so afraid to have this surgery. Went to visit her today and her husband told me that she is in the emergency room complaining of severe stomach pains. Then he went on to tell me how all she eats is potato chips and candy and refuses to listen. She doesn't take her vitamins or protein shakes and she doesn't make sure she gets enough protein from food. She lives on junk food. Since her surgery, Darcy has been in and out of the hospital, all due to her refusing to listen to what she needs to do. She has had to be fed by IV so many times. She has been given vitamin shots. She has been given tons of pain pills which she is addicted to, thus the trips to the emergency room for more. Well, lately they have been refusing to give her the pain pills until she sees a psychiatrist and he states the pain is real and not psychological. Today same deal. Darcy should have never had this surgery in the first place. She never did any research on it. She did not have a psych eval before doing it. And post op she did not seek any kind of support. All Darcy wanted was to be thin again, and she didn't care how she was going to do it. She makes herself vomit at times cause she's afraid she will get fat again. Well, I tried helping her through the years, doing research on the internet, visiting her and trying to get her to do the things she needed to, but to no avail. I really don't know how she is still alive. I don't know why she isn't committed in a psych ward for awhile. That is sad and awful to say, but so true. Well, I'm hoping now that I have had WLS maybe she will listen to me and we can do this together. Why am I writing all this? I'm just ventilating, Darcy literally scares the hell out of me.

Enough about Darcy. Talking about her can be depressing, but you know it's good sometimes to look at what can happen if you don't follow the steps one needs to take to be healthy afterWLS.

I'm doing okay. Getting good at sipping. Got the protein drink down pat, one scoop Isopure in Diet Cranberry juice in the morning and another one in the evening. 50 grams total. Then I eat to get the rest of the protein I need from my three meals. Still have to get more water in though. Sip,sip,sip all day long.

I now weigh 307 pounds. Thus have lost 42.7 pounds since surgery.

Must be doing something right, though I was hoping to be under 300 pounds. Need to get more exercise in though. I running around doing all kinds of errands for everyone. I need to regroup and put myself first again. Will try real hard this week to get more exercise in.

Spent my birthday walking on the black sand beach
at Punaluu. A very beautiful day. When heavy it's a chore walking in sand, you tend to sink and each step is a struggle. Well, no problem today, in fact I walked from one end to the other and didn't huff and puff as
usual.

My husband and I were lucky today as there were three turtles sunbathing on the sand. 

Five Weeks Post Op

It is just so hard to believe that I am 5 weeks post op. The days have just been passing by so quickly. Each day I have been getting stronger and seem to have more energy. My stitches have healed well. I'll wait one more week before going into the pool. I still have a nasty cough but it is getting better.

I'm doing better with my protein intake . Need at least 45-60 grams of protein a day. Start the day with taking B12, Calcium Caltrate and multivitamin. Then either Diet V8 Splash Tropical Blend or Diet Oceanspray Cranberry Juice with Zero Carb Isopure powder mixed in. Gives me 50 grams of protein. Now all I got to do is eat minimum 1 0z. more of protein with each of my three meals for the rest of the day. Took me four weeks to figure out how I could get the max protein down my throat and found that it was best to do it in the morning before the day ran away from me.

Sipping, I'm getting better at it. Sip down that morning protein drink, then it's sipping water or decafe tea for the rest of the day. Sipping from a pretty glass now, out went the cheapy plastic blah cups.

I don't count carbs, though I watch what I eat, I count protein and make sure I get my quota of protein in so that I heal, become healthier, and still lose weight. I stay away from carbs such as potatoes, rice, breads. I eat chicken and turkey pot pies but don't eat the crust for example. For fiber, I eat fruit, sometimes spinach, sometimes I drink 8 oz. prune juice.

My diabetes has improved, from 5-6 insulin shots a day, I am down to one 70 units of Lantus at night. My blood pressure numbers which were in the severe hypertension range have improved, the numbers have been in the normal and a few times in the mild hypertension range. Sleep apnea gone, I am sleeping better than I have in years.

I still twinge at times when I toss in bed. Still got to turn side to side slowly. If I am overly tired and missed a nap my tummy is tender and seems to weigh a ton, that's when my back aches. So naps are still a must.

I am walking each day about 30-45 minutes, be it outside or at the mall. One more week then it'll be laps in the pool. I have lots of energy when I wake up in the morn so after the protein drink, I try to take a walk or right after breakfast when I take my husband to the pool. It's so nice to have energy to do things.

Living life is not such a chore any more. I used to struggle to get out of bed, struggle to walk, struggle to breath, had so many limitations, so many obstacles got in my way of living. Five weeks and here's a new me.
Just like some of you other WLS post ops I am starting to love myself again.

Melissa

Feeling Better

Still coughing but feeling better. Tried to go walking but could do just a short walk before I started wheezing and coughing again. It's the vog and my allergies. Vog? Volcanic smoke. The volcano on our island has been erupting continuously for quite a few years and when there are no tradewinds the gases and smoke from the volcano lingers over the island. Best to stay indoors with the air conditioner going full blast.

Weighed Myself

Pre surgery : 349.7 (12/02/05)

Today : 309 (01/03/06)

Whoooooooooooooooopee. Going to break that 300 mark real soon.

Going to have to do something with my rings, they are no longer snug, I can twirl them around my fingers.

I started pulling out my crafts, crocheted some leis to donate to my church. We like to give leis to any visitors who come. I live on Hawaiian Home Lands, something similiar to an Indian Reservation, land set aside for Native Hawaiians. Anyway the hotels are about 15 minutes down the road so the tourists who want to go to church often come to ours. Our mass is in English but we sing some songs in Hawaiian, and our church has stained glass windows of native flowers and the walls are painted murals of Hawaiian scenery. A nice place to mingle with the locals.

Anyway I have to find something to do with my time besides worrying when I need to sip, when I have to stop before I can eat, eat, then wait before I got to sip again. I have a big problem with sipping, I can't seem to have enough time to sip at least 46 oz , this has got to get better. When I forget to sip, I gulp, then I'm praying for a burp. Sip, sip, sip. Right now it seems to be my biggest problem. I just thought of something, tomorrow I am going to pull out one of my crystal wine glasses I bought when we were stationed in Germany and sip like a queen having some fine wine. Yup, that's just what I will do and see if that will help.

Hope this cough gets better, would really like to do some walking.

Melissa

Horrors of Swallowing a Cough Drop

I started coughing early yesterday so bought myself some cough drops. Heh, how could a cough drop hurt me, right. Wrong. Should have listened to that little voice that warned me "what you going do if it slides down your throat". Well it did to my horror but thank goodness it had sort of shrunk in size by then cause I'ld really be in trouble.

So I spent New Year's Eve sipping hot water to try and melt the cough drop. My tummy felt awful. I could feel it moving things around and I was burping away. Felt miserable, so by 7pm I was fast asleep. I woke up at midnight to the sounds of the neighbors bursting fireworks. I still felt yukky. Kissed my husband "Happy New Year" and climbed right back into bed.

This morning not feeling so hot. I've got me a full blown cold. Must have caught it through cyberspace as several of you are also nursing colds. I think cause we still healing from our surgeries our resistance is low thus we caught colds.

As for cough drops, they are a thing of the past. I am not going through the stress as I did last night again. It was hard to keep calm and not run to the emergency room. Told myself to just calm down it will melt. When in reality I wanted to run around the house screaming for help.

Just thought of this: Would I have given a baby a cough drop? No. So why did I give my baby tummy one?
Got to be more careful in the future, this could have been a major crisis.

Melissa