TRYING TO FIND ME

Tuesday evening decided to drive to Vegas and be with my grandkids. So packed and left early Wednesday morning. Slept Wednesday night a Fort Bliss, El Paso. Woke Thursday morning and drove 12 hours to Vegas.

I've been having a hard time these past few weeks in San Antonio. I have been depressed, missing Hawaii, overwhelmed with being my husbands caretaker and not happy with my son's decision to buy a home in Vegas instead of coming to SA. I had all these plans to fill my days doing things with my grandkids. I moved to SA to have my family near me not some 2o something hours away. Well I know there must be a reason why things turned out this way and I need to be patient about this, but right now it just sucks.

My visit to the psych was so so. She seems to not be able to comprehend or understand the Hawaiian me. I may be expecting too much of her and anyway it is hard to start all over with a new therapist. She has a hard act to follow, Jaqueline my therapist in Hawaii and I just clicked, I could talk to her about anything. Anyway I spent part of the therapy session crying for Jaqueline. The psych was jotting away on her note pad, I wonder what she was jotting down. I don't know if this will work out but I'll give it another try. One good thing about the session was when I mentioned having WLS, she knew of a support group in the area. When I get back to SA in mid October, I'll go check them out.

I'll be going to San Francisco tomorrow and stay there for 5 days with my son Kamuela, his wife and two daughters on Travis Air Force Base. I have never been to San Francisco so I am excited. I am even more excited cause I'll have lunch on Sunday with Kim (sarge). It seems sureal, like a dream, meeting Kim will surely make the Neighborhood more real as I get to hug a real live breathing Kim! I am so excited, I get to meet my hero, my mentor.

Well I am trying to find me. I am trying to smile and be happy and greatful. Sometimes it is hard. I hope the psych works out. I really need someone to help me sort everything that is racing in my head.